Title: Love and honesty
Fandom: Criminal Minds
Movie quote for 10_quotes: #4 "What kind of saint hides in a church?" On the Waterfront
Disclaimer: Neither the show nor the characters belong to me, they belong to CBS. Nonetheless, I love to borrow them from time to time.
Summary: Sequel to ‘Warmth and comfort’, ‘Cold and discomfort’ and ‘Lovers and friends’. Penelope and Derek make some resolutions. :)warnings: spoilers for season 3
AN: I know, it’s been a long time again. And I’m sorry. I was pretty ill and pretty busy. :) But I hope it’ll get better now.
“Where’s Derek and why isn’t he answering his phone?” was Garcia’s first question when she’d finally found Reid in the crowd that filled the bullpen. She’d asked this question about a million times since she’d started working here and usually there was a simple answer to it. But yet it scared her every time he didn’t pick up ‘cause she knew how dangerous his job was.
And he hadn’t come back earlier that day with the others when they’d returned from their case in
The party was a whole lot of fun and a tradition none of them wanted to miss. All other holidays were for everybody’s family – but ringing in the New Year was for the BAU family. There was a lot of dancing and chatting and laughing and Derek never missed that party. Never. Except for this year.
“Um… he’s… he wasn’t with us, you know.” Reid stumbled. “I… I thought you knew that.”
“No, I didn’t.” Penelope pretty much shouted at him. “Why… Where is he?”
“I don’t know.” Reid shrieked.
“You don’t know? What does that mean, Reid?” she was clearly starting to get impatient.
“Look, I… I don’t know much.” he tried to defend himself. “All I know is that Derek was offered a new job and he stayed behind ‘cause he said he needed time to… get things straight, you know. I don’t know what he meant though, I don’t know why he didn’t join the party and I certainly don’t know where he is.”
“I guess I know what he meant.” Penelope mumbled and pretty much ran back to her office. It was easy to track him down with her babies since he hadn’t turned his cell phone off.
When she entered the church she wasn’t surprised that he was the only one in there, sitting in one of the last pews trying to pray. He sighed, shook his head, looked up to the statue of Jesus above the altar and then let his head sink back down.
“You know that God doesn’t care how you say your prayers as long as you say them.” she said after a while as she stepped closer.
“I never pictured you to be a fan of science fiction series.” he smirked.
Shrugging Penelope sat down next to him: “I have varying interests.”
“Why does that not surprise me?!” he smiled.
And then they were silent for a while. Penelope waited for Derek to tell her what was wrong. She knew that pressing him was useless. If he wanted to talk he would – and if he didn’t want to talk she would just keep him company. No one should ring in the New Year alone.
“Didn’t Kevin want to join the party?” he finally asked.
“How do you know he isn’t still there?” she shrugged.
Derek snorted. “I’m rather sure if he was he wouldn’t have let you come here.”
“Okay, he’s not there.” she admitted. “He went to see his family.”
“Did you… have a fight or something?” Derek wanted to know.
Penelope sighed and then quietly replied: “He wanted me to end my friendship with you.”
Derek couldn’t stop the anger from rising in his chest. Wasn’t it enough that Lynch had defrauded him of the possibility of being with Penelope?! Did he really have to take their friendship too?!
“I guess he’s jealous.” she shrugged.
“I was offered leading the field office in Indianapolis.” Derek told her, basically to keep her from telling him her decision.
“Yeah, Reid mentioned something like that.” Penelope turned a little to study his face. “And… are you going to accept?”
Derek took a deep breath and shrugged: “I think so.”
“Oh.” she repeated quietly and turned back to the altar.
He could swear he heard a slight sadness in her voice. “You know, I never wanted to be the reason you fight with Kevin. I think he’s right to be jealous. You know that our relationship is much more than just friendship. You’re closer to me than any other person in the world, even my mom and my sisters. That’s why I’m relieving you of having to make that decision.”
“Don’t you want to know what I told him?” she replied in a low voice and turned her head to look at him again.
Derek wasn’t too sure about that so he remained silent.
“I made him give back my keys.” her voice was barely more than a whisper and then she took Derek’s hand. “That was why he wasn’t at the party. We split up almost a month ago.”
Derek opened his mouth to say something but decided against it. He hadn’t known what to say anyway. Saying that he was glad about that certainly wouldn’t have been appropriate. And saying that he was sad simply would have been a lie.
“It’s true.” Penelope added in a whisper. “You’re much closer to me than anyone else, even closer than Kevin ever was, I guess. And I don’t want to lose that.”
Derek stared at her for a second before he replied: “I haven’t taken the job yet. I could still stay. If you… if you want me to.”
She squeezed his hand and locked eyes with him. She could see in his eyes what he meant. So she took a deep breath and whispered: “Don’t leave me, Derek! I don’t want to spend a single day without you.”
All he could do was smile at her. He wasn’t sure if he dared to lean over and kiss her. He was rather sure that was inappropriate behavior in a church.
Instead he squeezed her hand in return and quietly asked: “So… where do we go from here?”
“How about home?” she shrugged. “There’s a lot we need to talk about, I guess.”
He nodded and they just smiled at each other for a few minutes. Penelope could hear the people shouting in the streets announcing that the New Year had just begun. Smiling she leaned over for a long, soft and soulful kiss.
When they pulled apart Derek squeezed Penelope’s hand again and smiled: “Happy New Year, baby girl.”
She tilted her head and smirked slightly: “I’ll show you a happy New Year, hot stuff.”Derek chuckled and leaned closer again. “I have no doubt about that.” he whispered before he kissed her again.